On Missing

miss - v.tr. - To feel the lack or loss of... ex. Do you miss your family?

I have never missed someone so much in my life...alive,that is. I missed my grandparents so much. They went to some place that I can't follow. Well,at least not yet. Maybe I was really designed differently. I lack the real emotions that the regular humans would feel. I think differently. I wonder who taught me that.

And now,here comes this girl. I even barely know her, but I am head over heels on her. Let's get this straight, I am in love with her. There's no "why's", "how's", I just know and I just feel it...and I miss her.

Let me try to explain the feeling...it felt that if I can't see or hold her,I feel empty. I felt that for the first time when I didn't see her...it was a weekend,she didn't go to school. I felt empty yet something inside me felt like it is being squeezed...hard! If I don't see her,I always look forward for the next day because I will have that chance to be with her. I will say this again and again...she completes me.

I don't usually show my feelings but I want it to me known that I miss her...I miss my CAT. If anyone who has the chance to read this and knows my CAT,please tell her that I miss hear and I only miss her when I breathe and that my love for her is true and so shall I remain with my CAT.

Do I feel that I miss someone? Yes! I feel the lack of something or someone important and so dear to me. So let it be known that I do feel missing someone...missing my CAT.^.^

The CAT who took my heart

I am not writing here a book on Dr. Seuss, I love his books though,for the record and I grew up with it.
This is about a person,a girl,to be exact,who wanted to be known as "CAT."
I've met her in the last quarter of 2012. I can really say that on that day, it was really special. Everyday is special indeed, but that day was extra special. She walked in the room and into my life...and like a cat, she walked in with style. She was the only one that got my attention! There were many who entered a building and for me it is just another person,well,she's not! Like I said, she's got my attention. From then on, I learned how to pray and learnt that I've got a heart that beats like a drum! I've never thought that it was there inside the hollow cavity in my body. It leapt when CAT was in sight.
I wasn't expecting anything,not expecting that I would fall so hard. Call me a fool but I heard someone said that when one is in love,everybody is a fool,there's no exception to the rule.
The very first thing I noticed about her was her smile and when she smiles, you can see those cute dimples on her face. That smile makes my knees shake. I don't know why.
I've got the chance to stand next to her and for the first time in my life, I can't think straight. Maybe this is how a teenager felt the first time they fell in love. Honestly,I didn't ever feel such a thing. From that moment,my brain and heart agreed, "It is her...or be alone." How can I be so sure about it? The future is sure, I will just do what I can today.
I was always waiting for an opportunity but if I won't do anything, nothing would ever happen...then she left. Again,the only time in my life that I regretted so much. I had some regrets in my life but not as big as this. I should have done something, I should have, at the very least, talk to her and know a little bit about her.
My hopes went high when I learned that she is coming back. This time, I will be ready. This time I will seize that chance...this time, I will...and I'm very nervous again. She isn't even back yet.
Then,she was back and this time I made sure that I will have the chance to talk to her. Luck was on my side, I was given the best opportunity to talk to her. I was assigned to be in her class because her teacher was absent. I should thank that teacher. I did my best to be her teacher that time and despite the nervousness, I think I made it through without losing my mind,though it almost came to a point. She's so cute!!! But I have to be professional. I'm at work and I shall give her my best. It was then when she asked what I usually do in my free time. This is my chance! I told her what I do and casually asked her if she would like to join. When she said she'd like to go with me, I'm in a new world. She just didn't know how happy she made me that day. So that's how it started that I fell in love with CAT and she took my heart with her.
2012 was about to end and I am not really into celebrating new year. For me it is always the same,but this is not the same. Maybe I will have the chance to spend a new year's eve with someone special. I took the chance to ask her out when she said that she wanted to wear a dress and have dinner. So I invited her that we will have a dinner together and that she can wear a dress. That made me really excited and for the first time in my life,I was a nervous wreck.
New Year's eve came and we planned to go to a mountain area where you can observe the fireworks. It was really good that I took her there,of all my new years, 2013 was the best. We stayed there until the morning to watch the new year's sunrise and it was a new sunrise for me as well. Here is a girl with me,who I think is extra-ordinary. I am sure she won't agree,but she can't see what I see.
My 2013 started very great,even if I don't really follow time. I have all the time in the world with my CAT. With her,it is always "one more day." One more day to be with her even if she is away. One more day that I can be with her. One more day that I can give my love to her...one more day that I give myself and everything else to her. It is to be with CAT or be alone with a cat.
I am going to keep her and I will take care of my CAT. I will make her happy and share my happiness with her. I have nothing else to ask in this world. I have my CAT...Mix-chan, Nakajima Satomi. I love her and I love her every moment. I love her wherever she may be. I love her because I am at home in her embrace, I love her because I kept on falling in love with her. I have the whole future ahead to know her more and to love her more. Indeed,she is my happiness.
CAT took my heart and I am letting her keep it.

This is my CAT with her cat.^.^

2013

Hello 2013!!! 
If I have to follow the norms of the society then I have to greet everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR! I also wish that everyone is going to have a great year ahead of them. Following time again, my 2013 started really great! Unlike my start of 2012, it was a lonely one. 2012 for me ended with a bang and 2013 started even with a bigger bang! And, I didn't have to celebrate the new year alone. It was a great start of the year.
As they say, "Every beginning has an end, but every end is a new beginning." My 2012 began as a dud, but ended up great so I face 2013 with a greater expectation. I know that it will end,but I have high hope for the beginning and end cycle.
For 2013, I have to thank "CAT." She made everything great. Will it end what we began? Yes! Definitely! I will end up with her. How can I be so sure about it? Because in the end,the very last of it, I am going to be there.